Think of Him always...

You have heard people say it..prayer works.  Being a former skeptic myself, it was hard to believe.  Well, now I know why it was so hard to believe..because I didn't!  Once I let God in, all the way, I asked for something.  I had to give up myself, whole-heartedly, and let Jesus do the job.  I prayed to quit smoking. 

I went a week and a half. 

Have you ever heard the saying, 'be careful what you ask for'?  I prayed that God would help me quit.  Thinking that you can quit doing something that you've done for the past 14 years will be easy, is un-realistic.  What I should have prayed for was not quitting, but giving myself, fully, to Him to do what he would want with me.  I felt like I had given myself whole-heartedly, and for the first week, I had no problems.  Then, I started letting the world creep back in because all I could think about was those tiny white comfort sticks.  My mind wandered from the comfort zone of Jesus to the comfort zone I had know for so long.  I didn't want to go to church.  I didn't want to read the Bible.  I wanted to smoke.

Is smoking a sin?  For me personally, God has answered...no.  The sin is when smoking becomes more important than Him.  I think you could take my bad habit, and change it out for yours for a better perspective.  Let's say you love to go fishing, or golf.  Do you ever find your mind wandering from what you are doing to those things?  Are you ever in church and thinking about being at home finishing up your laundry or house work? 

Most of the world looks at a smoker and thinks, "They will die young, and how disgusting!"  But what about people that are consumed by (pardon my choice) golfing?  They take time away from their families to do something that temporarily fulfills a need...just like a cigarette.  You can die from anything, you know.

God has given me a chore.  Take all of your thoughts, throw them out the window, and be with Him.  Before I quit, when I smoked, I would turn all of my attention to that.  Lately, I have found myself able to think about God during all of my normal activities.  This, I believe, is what He wants.  He knows that you have things going on, but He wants your attention during all of it. 

It's hard..but it is getting easier.  Your life, once given to Jesus, should be constantly about praising Him, and thanking Him, and wanting to be with Him.  I pray that God could help me fall, all the way, into his arms!!  I know that prayer works.  Part of praying, however, is giving your faith to God, and knowing that he will come through.  It's easy to do it for someone else...you KNOW that God will help the person you just prayed for.  But what about yourself?  It's a horrible struggle of self doubt, and unwillingness to give in to faith.

I don't want to share this, and this is not a pity blog.  But I will, because I want someone else out there to know that they are not the only one who is searching for that moment, that seems so close...when you can fall backwards and let Jesus catch you.  As for me, I am currently at peace with my decision, and feel that when it is time, God will release me from my addiction.   

An applicable quote from God's word, in talking about what is clean and unclean:
10 Jesus called the crowd to him and said, "Listen and understand. 11 What goes into a man's mouth does not make him 'unclean,' but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him 'unclean.' "

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